Statement

This piece uses acrylic paint on canvas done in a realistic or realism style. With a darker hues, darker values, to create this emotional experience for you. Tried to capture some sadness, some despair and really what it's about for me after receiving John's picture. I had this idea, like, with a question mark there and with the eyes, who am I. Always a personal struggle, being first Nation, but not growing up on reserve, identifying as First Nation was difficult. It just wasn't in me. Wasn't taught in me. My mother went through day school, and she never taught language to us. Our only experience in First Nation was going to the reserve during school break, it was more of a vacation destination for us. For us we had no idea what the First Nation was. That's what I tried to capture here. With John's work, with the question mark, the question for me was, who am I?

I titled this piece Lost Identity. It's more about my own lost identity and trying to figure out who I am and where I fit in the grand scheme of things. This picture reminds me of a story. I went to Mexico a couple of years ago. We look very similar, we have the same features. One day, a lady comes up to me, she starts speaking Spanish to me. I can speak a little Spanish and I respond, I don’t speak the language. She looks at me and asks, Cubana? I respond, no I'm not Cuban either. This goes on for a while and the only thing that she understood was a mainstream First Nations sound of whooping with my hand over my mouth. At the time we thought it was funny. In hindsight, not so funny. When I was doing this, I was trying to answer the question of, who am I? It's more about cultural appropriation, like we were always taught and told, in school, what First Nations people were. But it was through the eyes of the western society. That’s where the headdress in the image is representative of First Nations people. Not indicative to certain tribes, but it is associated with First Nations people. You could put the image of a feather headdress anywhere in the world and people would say, oh, that's First Nations. That's not really who we are. Right?

With not a lot of clothing, and a little bit of dirty, I tried to evoke that image that was always presented of First Nations people. But again, it's about cultural appropriation, this is the end of the story, now all the truth is coming out with Truth and Reconciliation, and this is the end of it. As you can see, the sun is setting. There's a lot of pain, a lot of hurt, a lot of sadness with the story of the truth that comes out for first peoples.

Stay tuned for a sister print in Round 4. This image is the truth. The second part will be the reconciliation.